That’s about all I have to say about that.

Pope Sinphaltimus Exmortus
The First Ever Digital Church Of Mind Slack.

Also, I’ve seen more press about the Church in the mid-to-late 2000s than in many previous periods.

The Church of the SubGenius has declared bankruptcy. Besides canceling X-day and leaving many musicians and performers with unpaid bills and useless plane tickets, the loss of tax revenue has cause the city of Sherman NY to close it’s only remaining police station and suspend activity at the public library and high school.

While Stang refuses to admit the truth, he was heavily invested in Bernard Maydoff’s Ponzi scheme trying to cover himself for the church’s promise of “eternal salvation or triple your money back”.

It’s so bad that our very founder J.R. “Bob” Dobbs has converted to Kali worship.

The “best of the one true religions” is a fake.

I do want to make a couple of corrections. Rev. Magdalen’s case is still not completely settled, but for the last two years, she has had custody of the child — a teenager, now. We deliberately went out of our way to campaign to get Dobbs elected Fraud of the Century in TIME’s poll of 2000 and it is something we are proud of. While we do hold events and produce several radio shows and websites, we are actually best known for our books, which one usually finds in the Humor Section of stores, for some reason. THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS (Simon & Schuster) is now in its 19th printing, and our other two main books, REVELATION X and the most recent one, THE SUBGENIUS PSYCHLOPAEDIA OF SLACK (2006) are also still in print and in stores.

We are still ordaining people for $30 at the rate of from 3 to 5 a day. If these are joke ordainments, then thousands of people have wasted money on divorces after being married by SubGenius ministers.

Thanks again for the attention.

P.S. I paid $30 for a subscription to MAD Magazine, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I believe its teachings. (Although I in fact DO.)

These infected brains are currently being re-wired into SubGenius drones and come late 2010 the rewiring will be complete and the Church will move into phase three.

The so called counter culture will be the first to be culled by the drones.

Stock up on canned goods.

You need to check out http://www.subgenius.com for updates on Magdalen’s case, as I believe she got her kid back.

Or you could write Ivan Stang DIRECTLY from the site (there’s contact info there) for the latest news on the Church of the SubGenius, such has he’s been teaching a Course on Line at least the last two, maybe three years at Maybe Logic regarding the History of the SubGenius Foundation.

And, ofcourse, there’s the free for all of alt.slack on usenet (available via Google Groups) and there’s a major subgenius presense on YouTube, Stang keeps a small heard of videos there, as well as Philodrummond and PuzzlingEvidenceTv.

And it’s not just centered around the North East or South, The Puzzling Evidence Radio Show has been on since at least 1983, every week, on KPFA.

And Dr. Hal’s ASK DR. HAL SHOW has been running for 13? 15? years in San Francisco.

Stimpson Jaycat, aka CHIMPSTOP.

Known in the Church of the SubGenius as

The Right Rev. El Bonobo Bandito.

All due respect, Maddie, but just because you move in different circles doesn’t mean the Church of the SubGenius isn’t thriving. On the contrary, this Slackless new century has resulted in a resurging Golden Age of SubGenius radio ministries and podcasts, not to mention frequent the Church’s frequent Devivals here and in Europe and other Church affairs. I AM pleased and surprised to note that you DID have your ear to the ground enough to note that the X-Day events in Sherman NY are a yet-ongoing yearly blowout–what with the cult-sized grave you have dug here, I figured that would be tossed in the information crypt along with all the rest.

Listen: One overriding fact about the Church of the SubGenius is that we run SO deliberately counter to the mainstream that it’s small wonder that we don’t pop up in whatever media “limelight” is presently snaring your attention. That is neither here nor there, as they say. But I’m still glad you cared enough to print our obit, giving the Church of the SubGenius a chance to remind whatever small slice of the internet world who frequents this corner that yes, the news of our passing has been greatly exaggerated–and we couldn’t be laughing about this gaffe more heartily than we are now.

Thanks for the chortle!

Sincerely,
Rev. Susie the Floozie
“Bob”‘s SlackTime Funhouse
Weekly since 1994 on WREKfm Atlanta