The Worst Words Ever

Seth Fischer bio ↓  ·  July 12th, 2009  ·  filed under books

“What word do you hate and why?” 

That was the question posed to poets this year at the Ledbury Poetry Festival. Answers ranged from chillax (ugh) to redact (yuck) to appall. And Phillip Wells’ explanation of hatred for the word “pulchritude” was just outstanding:

“(I)t violates all the magical impulses of balanced onomatopoeic language – it of course means “beautiful”, but its meaning is nothing of the sort, being stuffed to the brim with a brutally latinate cudgel of barbaric consonants.”

I hate the word utilize, which I know makes me sound like grammar school teacher circa 1984. But I don’t only hate it because it’s unnecessary and pretentious. It’s also that the z looks like it doesn’t belong, with all those pointy, tall letters around it. And it’s impossible to smile when you you hear someone say it.

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Seth Fischer's writing has appeared or is forthcoming in Swink, PankGuernica, Monkeybicycle, Gertrude, and elsewhere. He's Sunday Editor at The Rumpus and founding editor of The Splinter Generation and webscribbler.net. He also does writing consultation. Reach him at seth.fischer (at) gmail.com or @sethfischer. More from this author →

15 Responses to “The Worst Words Ever”

  1. sally Says:

    I hate the word “supper:. I don’t know why – I feel like dinner is more than sufficient and supper just sounds icky to me. Not like the way I would want a meal to sound.

  2. Hiya Says:

    “Within.” (Should only be used to distinguish itself from “in,” not as a fanciful substitute for “in,” yet near-ubiquitous.) “Garner.” (Fury-causing, ugly.) “Tome.” (There aren’t enough words for “book,” so if you are a writer, you get pushed into the corner of “tome,” even if you’re just talking about a regular-sized book. Doesn’t make sense but is technically correct and therefore doesn’t ping the British copy editor’s radar.) “Blurb.” Also, “natural” and “hipster” because they are definitionless and as such are pretty much only used to lie, sell things, or insult someone. Most of all, “P.C.” (This is a term invented by the right wing in order to keep people away from their desires for accuracy and equality. If you use it, you’re playing that game.)

  3. Zak Smith Says:

    “Pulchritude” is an excellent word. Say it. Notice all the things your face does when you say it. You have to spit, kiss, and bite just to get it out of your mouth. It’s only bad if you say it with a french accent and then something ugly happens when “tude” becomes a duosyllable rattling down a well.

  4. tack Says:

    Webinar. I hate the way it sounds. It’s the aural equivalent of a loud outfit with clashing colors. I want to make the people who use it sit through a thousand timeshare presentations.

  5. Brian Spears Says:

    Facilitate–ugh. It’s right up there with “utilize” in the pantheon of “words people use to make themselves seem more important.” And I’m with Zak on pulchritude–that’s an awesome word. I think people ought to use nary more often as well.

  6. Lisa McCool-Grime Says:

    I haven’t met a word I didn’t love once I’d spent some time with it. But I do sometimes hate to hear the words I love in other people’s mouths (and I have been guilty of ruining a few good words myself).

  7. Sarah Says:

    Libations. Yuck. Does not facilitate good feelings. While think libidos are wonderful, and though libation and libido do not in fact share any etymological commonality, the word “libation” leaves a sleazy taste in my mouth. Also, it is a turgid, pretentious and and/or generally bombastic term that should not be utilized within the conversational sphere.

    Ditto loving pulchritude. Also, love prosaic. And bubble.

    Hate hate hate supper! I’m glad someone is with me on this.

  8. JMW Says:

    It’s hard not to focus exclusively on ridiculous neologisms like “webinar.” In that same vein, I hate “staycation,” which has already made its way into Merriam-Webster’s, and “unputdownable,” as in “I finished this book in one sitting. It was unputdownable.” I find it difficult to accept the literary recommendation of someone who would use the word unputdownable.

  9. Marilyn Wise Says:

    I immediately change the channel whenever I hear a media type person use the “C-word” (C-O-O-L). It has been entirely corrupted and is now used primarily in vain attempts by middle-aged idiots to seem acceptable to their children.

  10. Jeremy Hatch Says:

    I remember somebody in the Guardian UK also ranting about the word “unputdownable.” To paraphrase, it was something like “who created this freak of a book? Does it latch onto your hands with metal claws? Do they use glue? If it’s unputdownable, it’s probably safer not to pick it up in the first place.”

  11. Alaun Says:

    Frontenac. Ugh!

  12. Wylie Says:

    Moist. *shudder*

  13. Lorelle Says:

    Rather amusing, considering “pulchritude” was my favorite word for most of my life–for no good reason.

  14. Cara Says:

    moist, creamy, foliage, caucus & fescue just to name a few

  15. haley Says:

    Moist, suculant, tender, and supper.

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