Rumpus Columns

Ted Wilson

March 15th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #27

ABRACADABRA
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing abracadabra. …more

March 8th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #26

NEEDLEPOINT
★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing needlepoint. …more

March 1st, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #25

THE ERECTION I HAD LAST THURSDAY
★★★★★ (2 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the erection I had last Thursday. …more

February 22nd, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #24

GOOGLE
★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Google. …more

February 15th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #23

CRYING
★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing crying. …more

February 8th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #22

JOHNNY TREMAIN’S HAND
★★★★ (1 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Johnny Tremain’s hand. …more

February 1st, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #21

OCULTO PANTALONES NUDIST COLONY
★★★★ (4 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Oculto Pantalones Nudist Colony. …more

January 25th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #20

NONPROFITS
★★★★★ (2 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing nonprofits. …more

January 18th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #19


TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES
★★★★ (1 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. …more

January 11th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #18

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENTS
★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Public Service Announcements. …more

January 4th, 2010

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #17

THAT PICTURE FRAME MODEL
★★★★★ (2 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing that picture frame model. …more

December 28th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #16

AVATAR
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Avatar. …more

December 21st, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #15

POWDERED WIGS
★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing powdered wigs. …more

December 14th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #14

PONZANI BROS. APPLIANCE REPAIR
★★★★ (1 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Ponzani Bros. Appliance Repair. …more

December 7th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #13

FAKING AN ILLNESS FOR SYMPATHY
★★★★ (4 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing faking an illness for sympathy. …more

November 30th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #12

INTERCOURSE
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing intercourse. …more

November 24th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #11

THE MANCHESTER VILLAGE MOTOR INN
☆☆☆☆☆ (0 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the Manchester Village Motor Inn of Manchester, CT. …more

November 17th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #10

THE FOR SALE SIGN PLACED IN MY YARD
★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the ‘for sale’ sign placed in my yard. …more

November 9th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #9

THE BIBLE
★★★★ (1 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the Bible. …more

November 2nd, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #8

A HAT MY NEPHEW FOUND ON THE BUS
★★★★ (1 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing a hat my nephew found on the bus. …more

October 26th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #7

“WHY I WANT TO VISIT HAWAII” BY FELICIA MCCARTHY
★★★★★ (2 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing “Why I Want to Visit Hawaii” by Felicia McCarthy. …more

October 19th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #6

PORCUPINES
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing porcupines. …more

October 13th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #5

THE ROCKVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the Rockville Public Library. …more

October 5th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #4

TIME TRAVELERS
★★★★★★ (5 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing time travelers. …more

September 28th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #3

GLENN BECK
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Glenn Beck. …more

September 21st, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #2

MY BODY
★★★★ (4 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing my body. …more

September 14th, 2009

Ted Wilson Reviews the World #1

THE VENDING MACHINE IN MY SISTER’S APARTMENT BUILDING LOBBY
★★★★ (1 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing the vending machine in the lobby of my sister’s apartment building.

Located at 81 Empire St., Allston, MA, it contains mostly snacks (my favorite is A4, the York Peppermint Pattie) but it also dispenses condoms and gum (which I don’t consider a snack because it’s not meant to be swallowed). The placement of the gum is dangerously close to the condoms and on two occasions I’ve accidentally purchased the condoms. On one of those occasions I didn’t notice what I had done until I put the “gum” in my mouth. …more

About Ted Wilson

Ted Wilson was an accountant for over 40 years at Rockville Insura-Best, Inc. After his wife died he figured that would be the end of things. But fate took a surprising turn and now he's a member of the Ryan Montbleau Band for which he plays tuba and harpsichord.

Subscribe

Subscribe to this author's blog via RSS

Other Columns

Brian SchwartzA FAN’S NOTES, The Rumpus Sports Column #22: The Army Awakened   ...moreMarch 18th, 2010

Dear SugarDEAR SUGAR, The Rumpus Advice Column #28:   ...moreMarch 18th, 2010

Rumpus EventsA Night Together in New York City   ...moreMarch 15th, 2010




Get a cool ass Rumpus t-shirt.

Subscribe to The Daily Rumpus

Email:

Donate to the rumpus