A Letter from Satan to Pat Robertson


I don’t know who Lily Coyle of Minneapolis, Minnesota is, but if I ever meet her, I might have to kiss her for this letter to the editor of the Minneapolis Star Tribune. It’s in the voice of Satan, and it’s beautiful.

“Dear Pat Robertson, I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I’m all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating.”

There’s more. Read it all. It’s the second letter down.

Brian Spears's first collection of poetry, A Witness in Exile, is now available through Louisiana Literature Press, and at his personal website. He is the Poetry Editor for The Rumpus, and teaches poetry at Drake University. More from this author →