“Your Patriarchy Is the Reason We Can’t Have Nice Things: Scenes from a Feminist Youth,” is a McSweeney’s piece that begins with a mother giving birth–asking her doctor not to impose gendered imperatives on her as he tells her to squeeze–and ends with a “young womyn” majoring in Fine Arts at Barnard, dating “briefly a redhead, MOLLY,” and ending the relationship “when lesbianism is no longer en vogue in the pseudo-intellectual circles.”