FUNNY WOMEN #137: Press Release for Zeitgeisty Book

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The Girl Who Met the Girl With the Notion of Falling Apart in a Devastating and Beautiful Way
by Bo Bastian
[572p.; 350 slides/images; 12 hours]

From the #1 bestselling author of the #1 bestselling BDSM series Bind2Bound I-V comes the #1 bestselling sensational literary debut novel that takes readers on a mythical, translucent journey into the depths of domesticity and beyond.

Cultures come together then clash, personalities flourish then flounder, and at the heart of it all, one woman finds another woman who has found the man who holds the key to a centuries-old secret, a secret so profound and brimming with proclivity, that it just may shatter the tenuous façade of this tranquil domicile set in the near-ish-future metropolis of Calgary, Alberta, Canada.

One Man’s Depths…
Before his death, George Washington (based on George Washington) burned a confidential notebook in the dead of night beneath his beloved cherry tree from whence were produced the most sumptuous cherries. The notebook’s ashes mixed with the roots, and from then on out, whomever should pick a cherry would ingest the notebook’s contents and live as the great general Washington had lived, more or less.

Daly2

One Woman’s Death…
In fin de siècle Paris, a courtesan is found dead by a mustachioed sculptor. As he lifts her lifeless body from the cobblestone streets, a gnarled web of roots keeps her in place. The sculptor’s tools are not sharp enough to disengage the corpse from its tangled resting place, so he makes his peace by taking her pence and continues on his merry way. Over the centuries, millions of tourists step over the buried courtesan as she sinks deeper and deeper into the depths of the magnifique city. Whomsoever unwittingly steps over her final resting place will suffer from ghosting.

Something Else Entirely…
Meanwhile, in modern contemporary Now-America, the revisionist histories of dignitaries and plebes combine to provide a sort of shared cultural trauma that shakes awake the sudden unfurling of plot that crashes through (metaphorically) the reinforced windows of the pre-economic-collapse-apartment that houses a very ordinary couple (a couple just like you, dear reader) and changes their life on the serious.

Nothing will ever be ordinary again.

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In an international race against time—through London! Morocco! all the Chinatowns! Iceland!—in order to piece together the prophesy that unlocked the beauty of disaster during challenging political climates, this sweeping tome belongs on every single person’s Goodreads list for TheGreatestLiteraryFictionOfAllTimeButReally. 

With ravishing prose and also devastating prose, this truly wholly original but eerily familiar work is sure to stun and surprise, enrapture and disturb you, until you ultimately surrender to its lyric melancholy and seminal societal relevance and importance. Blending fact with fiction, farce and fallacy, passion and confusion, this stellar literary debut has an ending you’ll text home about.

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Daly1“Elan! Ennui! Oui oui, yes, please.” –New York Times

“Following in the tradition of Franzen, the freshest, newest voice of a generation—sharp, poignant, unflinchingly honest, with an errant but engaging gaze revealing devastating truths.” –Jonathan Franzen

“Gripping. Don’t you dare miss it.” –People

“I laughed so hard I cried, and then each tear became a small planet, where my sadness began to thrive, soon birthing new nations, made of hair combs and bent into shades of tie-dye, unlike any kind of pegasus you’ve ever seen.” –Automated reviewer

“Not enough semen.” –Jodi Picoult

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Available now on Scribd, Kindle, Nook, YouTube, SoundCloud, Flickr, Facebook, Audible, bucket lists, and Google Cardboard.

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Rumpus original art by Annie Daly. Purchase Annie’s art here.

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Niree Noel is an LA-based writer and editor. Her writings have appeared in McSweeney’s Internet Tendecy, Los Angeles Magazine, and elsewhere. She edits histories, biographies, and pictorials for Angel City Press. Be her Internet friend @nireenoel. More from this author →