The Daily Rumpus
Get Overly Personal Emails
From Stephen Elliott
Dear Sugar,
My mother left my father the month I was born. She remarried and had my brother two years later. My stepfather (the only father I knew) committed suicide when I was five years old. My mother became a raging alcoholic following his death.
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Dear Sugar,
I stutter.
That is the truth that I have lived nearly twenty-eight years of my life trying to avoid. And of course there is no real avoidance because my stutter permeates every single goddamn thing that I do. My stutter is, as you would say, my Obliterated Place.
Dear Sugar,
Please oh please help me. I’m so mixed up and in so much pain that I’m beginning to be afraid I might kill myself, though I have two small children and basically know I can’t and would never, and I definitely know how crazy and self-dramatizing that is.
...moreDear Sugar,
Three of my best college buddies and I go away for an annual guys weekend at a cabin in the woods.
...moreDear Sugar,
I just heard that you plan to reveal your identity at a party The Rumpus is having for you on Valentine’s Day. I don’t know how I feel about that!
...moreI’m answering two letters at once this week, sweet peas.
Dear Sugar,
I’m 29 and dating a man that I adore; we’re planning to move in together soon. I have a stable job that I hate, but I hope that I’ll one day find something I enjoy. I have family and friends and hobbies and interests and love.
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Dear Readers,
Last week I asked you to write to me about what you’re grateful for. The response was overwhelming.
...moreDear sweet peas,
As long-time readers of this column know, it’s my tradition that every time I reach a “new decade” of columns I write shorter answers to several questions instead of the usual longer, single question column.
...moreDear Sugar,
Ever since I was small girl of about six, I have delighted in the idea of growth. And I don’t mean spiritual or emotional or mental growth. I mean literal growth. The idea of expansion has always excited me.
...moreDear Sugar,
I’m writing this from my little couch/bed in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit at Egelston Children’s Hospital in Atlanta.
...moreDear Sugar,
I’m 26 years old and finally in a relationship I cherish and feel proud of. I want so much for it to thrive.
...moreDear Sugar,
I’m a woman in my mid-50s. I read your column regularly and believe that my question is pedestrian but am humbly asking for your advice and support anyway as I sit in the pain of it all.
...moreDear Readers,
This week I’m answering two letters together. Each letter is from one of the women involved in the situation detailed in the letters. I wouldn’t have known the two letters were connected but for the (unpublished) postscript one of the letter writers added, informing me that she knew the other woman involved had written to me as well.
...moreDearest Sweet Peas,
One month ago I received an email from a woman named Colleen Wainwright. She wasn’t asking me for advice.
...more Dear Sugar,
I’m 29 year-old woman who is engaged to be married to a man I’ve been with for about two years (we’ve lived together for one). I’m very close to my sister.
...more Dearest Sweet Peas,
Long-time readers of my column know that it’s my tradition that every time I reach a “new decade” of columns I do a Q&A, in which I write shorter answers to several questions instead of the usual longer, single question column.
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Dear sweet peas,
I’m taking some time off, so I don’t have a new column for you, but I’m still sending a weekly message out to the members of my Google group. I sent out this one earlier today and Stephen Elliott suggested we publish it on the site.
...moreDear Sugar,
I’m seeing a woman I love and I believe she loves me, but she’s very insecure. This manifests in several ways,
...moreDear Sugar,
1. It’s taken me many weeks to compose this letter and even still, I can’t do it right.
...moreDear Sugar,
I need your help with forgiveness. I am carrying a fierce anger in my body every day, and I can’t seem to find my way out of it.
...moreDear Sugar,
My brain is unquiet today. I had a sex dream about my wife this morning and woke feeling terrible. I realized that at some point in my life, I became a man who feels terrible fantasizing about his wife.
...moreIn this very special Rumpus interview, Lidia Yuknavitch interviews our beloved Sugar:
A letter from Sugar:
Dearest sweet peas whose letters have been published in my columns,
I need your help. As many of you have suggested, I’m pursuing the possibility of publishing a book of my columns. In the course of this, I realized that I needed to make explicit what has been implicit all along:
...moreDearest Sugar, Light of My Thursday Afternoons:
I teach a few creative writing courses at the University of Alabama where the majority of my students are seniors graduating in May.
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