The Best Metaphors Ever

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“She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.”

“It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.”

“He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.”

“He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.”

Some “Funny metaphors used in high school essays.” (via @jessfleming)


Seth Fischer’s writing has twice been listed as notable in The Best American Essays and has been nominated for The Pushcart Prize by several publications, including Guernica. He was the founding Sunday editor at The Rumpus and is the current nonfiction editor at The Nervous Breakdown. He is a Dornsife PhD Fellow at USC and been awarded fellowships and residencies by Ucross, Lambda Literary, Jentel, Ragdale, and elsewhere, and he teaches at the UCLA-Extension Writer’s Program and Antioch University, where he received his MFA. More from this author →