the dog born March 30th who I will find 6 months from now
to know what it’s like to hurl myself down the mountain
for the wind to blow right through me
for someone with an operatic voice to sing The Eurythmics “Love Is a Stranger” with me. I will sing the low notes until she teaches me to reach the higher notes
to be obliterated
to roll into the wet grass with the hallucination walking towards me
to fly out of here
for the tree trunks to turn into snakes
to step out of the life I’ve known
to be knocked over with honesty
to let the hate running through my veins be channeled in the right directions
to be swallowed by the desert
for someone to take my child off my hands while I go howl somewhere
to have you tell me, privately, every single thing you have ever felt about me that you would never normally tell me because let me tell you, we’re in a window when I can take it, and take it in, and I will never repeat it back to you and I will not reply but I am famished for honesty
to unzip this skin and walk out (again)
for you to let me go on and on if I have to
for you to understand when I can’t reply
safe passage to May
