Beth Ward is an Atlanta-based writer and editor. Her work has appeared previously in publications including The Rumpus, BUST Magazine online, Pigeon Pages Literary Journal, The Bitter Southerner, Atlas Obscura, Suspira Magazine, Cunning Folk Magazine, and elsewhere. She currently sits on the board of the Georgia Writers Association.
Know that you will be whole only when you run behind the curtain to slide yourself between the wooden planks of the next box, only when nobody is looking at you.
What does not occur to me at the moment of this bloodlust, will not until much later, is that I am actively seeking the violence. I want to witness the worst.
Sideshows themselves are a place where people come to see a public display of their private fears. Fear of deformity, of a disruption of the gender binary, of mutation, of disfigurement, of a crossover with the animal world, of being out of proportion.