Ted Wilson Reviews the World #149


★★★★★ (3 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Wonder Woman’s invisible jet.

Wonder Woman has an invisible jet that she uses to travel to places that are too far to easily reach by train or car. Little is know about this jet, but it is a technological feat. The entire jet and all its inner workings are rendered invisible through methods unknown.

Strangely, the designers of this jet chose not to make the pilot invisible. On the one hand, this seems like a design flaw – a person floating mysteriously through the air at incredible speeds is sure to draw attention. On the other hand, it must also be an intimidating sight. One that is sure to frighten opponents. My guess is that the designers secretly wanted to have a view of Wonder Woman’s butt as she flew above them.

The jet is personal-sized, meaning there’s only room for one: Wonder Woman. She could probably fit a small child on her lap if she had to, but until she has a baby, this won’t be a problem.

Also, her jet requires fuel and maintenance (where does one find an invisible replacement bolt?) as well as an area large enough to accommodate take-offs and landings. It’s also loud and can bother local residents.

Instead, I propose Wonder Woman simply hire someone who has the ability to fly. Flight is a pretty common power. There must be someone who never became a hero or villain but would be happy to make some extra cash carrying Wonder Woman to various destinations.

This person’s sole responsibility would be to take Wonder Woman where she says, wait for her while she battles someone, and then bring her back home. Wonder Woman and this flying person would not be allowed to have conversations. Otherwise they might become too close, and if captured, the flying person could be used as a pawn against Wonder Woman.

I’m not sure if the invisible jet has weapons or not. This flying person could carry a gun I suppose. All in all this seems like a vast improvement on the invisible jet.

Please join me next week when I’ll be reviewing spaghetti.

Ted Wilson is a musician, good friend, and widower. His website iamtedwilson.com features all of his reviews (even the banned ones), exciting videos, a live interview with Ted on the radio, and interviews with some of the world's top celebrities! More from this author →