X-RAY VISION
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)
Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing x-ray vision.
X-ray vision is where you can see naked ladies without them knowing it. It’s different from a peephole because the ladies remain fully clothed. The only people who have this ability currently are dentists and TSA employees. Superman can’t do it because he’s not real. And also he’s so asexual it probably wouldn’t even occur to him. I don’t think he even knows women have breasts.
There are other applications for x-ray vision but mostly people would use it for the nudity. If we all had x-ray vision, it would make dating easier. You would know immediately whether or not you could stand seeing the other person naked. This doesn’t mean unfit people couldn’t find dates because some people are attracted to unexpected things.
If I had x-ray vision I would first choose to use it to improve my hide-n-seek skills. I’m very bad at that game. I can never find the person hiding and it eventually becomes a test of wills. The person hiding gets tired and annoyed and ends up angry with me. That’s not what hide-n-seek is meant to be.
I would also use x-ray vision to find things. I’ve lost a lot of things in my house over the years and x-ray vision would means I could find them in seconds. Somewhere I lost an entire bike. There are treasures in this house just waiting to be unearthed.
If x-ray vision were widely available, we would no longer need windows. This would cripple the glass industry. All they would have left to manufacture would be glasses and glasses.
Eventually x-ray vision will become a reality. Maybe someone will invent an app that does it for Google’s electronic monocle.
As someone who has an excellent body and experience with nudism the idea of strangers being able to see me does not matter. This new trend of people giving up their privacy is something I’ve been doing for quite a while. I guess I’m ahead of my time.
Please join me next week when I’ll be reviewing a puddle.
