GODZILLA
★★★★★ (3 out of 5)
Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of everything in the world. Today I am reviewing Godzilla.
There’s a new movie coming out called Godzilla, and it looks a lot to me like a rip-off of an earlier movie of the same name, starring Matthew Broderick.
I haven’t seen it yet but I have seen the trailer. It appears to be a movie about a giant, angry dinosaur. It’s unclear why he is so angry. Perhaps because he is the last dinosaur and he feels an intense loneliness that can only be expressed through rage. Or perhaps this is a tale of revenge. Mankind has done something to him and now it’s time for payback.
Whatever the case, Godzilla is smashing a lot of buildings and likely taking lives in the process. It’s hard to have compassion for a protagonist who is so callous. Not impossible, however. I remember that poor killer in Silence of the Lambs. He must have had a really awful childhood. I cried for him watching that movie.
The special effects in the movie look to be extremely expensive, which is always a good sign as to the quality of a movie. I didn’t care for the special effects in Wreck-It Ralph. None of it looked real. It was some of the cheapest CGI I have seen in a long time.
To make sure this review is as accurate as possible, I will be updating it in real time while watching Godzilla once it comes out on VHS. Until that time, I can only tell you what little else I know about the film. It will cost upwards of ten dollars to see in a theater, depending on the location. If it is in 3D it will cost even more. You will be allowed to eat snacks and drink beverages during the film, but talking is frowned upon. At the end of the movie will be a credits section. This portion has nothing to do with the narrative of the film. It will simply be a list of all the people who made the movie.
Please join me next week when I’ll be reviewing a cloud forest.
