The Best Metaphors Ever
“She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.”
“It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.”
“He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.”
“He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.”
Some “Funny metaphors used in high school essays.” (via @jessfleming)
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Seth Fischer's writing has appeared or is forthcoming in
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The Splinter Generation. He also teaches and tutors and administrates and does copyediting and copywriting so that he can pay bills, but that only works sometimes. If you could help him make that work all the time, he would probably give you a hug, but only if you wanted one. Reach him at seth.fischer (at) gmail.com or
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March 25th, 2010 at 7:36 am
http://www.snopes.com/humor/lists/metaphor.asp
March 25th, 2010 at 9:13 am
Ah, yes … I suspected something like that. Hence the scare quotes. Still, they are pretty freakin’ hilarious.
May 9th, 2010 at 4:08 pm
these are similes…