How’s your day been?
What is it? What do you want? Tell me.
Did I answer yes to that question? It must have been cos you’re a ranga. I like rangas. So I was objectifying you. Hope that was okay.
Hahahahahaha! Hahahahahaha! Where the hell did that come from? One minute you’re this polite guy, and then …
I don’t think it’s disgusting. I love it when a guy comes on my face. I mean, not here. Obviously. My boyfriend.
What’s the problem? Have you been drinking or something?
How’s your day been?
No, I don’t mind. What do you want to do then? Yeah, we can just do that. We can do whatever you like.
Are you sure? Can you afford it? You don’t have to. We can just take an extra five minutes now. Does it mean you won’t come back for a while? I won’t see you for ages.
Is ‘conversate’ a word? I was pretty sure it’s not, but she was totally convinced. How do you find out if something’s really a word or not?
Yay! You know some guys, it just sort of dribbles out. Phwt.
He’s a regular of mine. I quite enjoyed it actually. I’ve never fucked someone up the ass with a dildo before.
How’s your day been?
Yeah, I get the same thing on my side. I can tell when they’re not going to pick me. They won’t even look at me. It’s humiliating. What is it that you ask? Yeah, I get it. It’s supposed to be meaningless. It’s just to see if I have an answer or not.
Do you mind if I drink from your glass?
I know. What am I going to do without her? I really miss her. It makes me sad.
Little kisses. Mwah, mwah. Little kisses. On the body, on the neck.
You’re how old? No! How old do you think I am?
How’s your day been?
Yes, I am a grand master at chess. … I was also a champion tennis player when I was younger, until my injury. I don’t have my own dark room any more, so I’ve given up the photography. … Now, tonight I’m going to let you go all around the world.
That’s terrible. I can’t believe someone who works here would behave like that.
I do get paid, eventually, but because I live here at the moment, I tend to get the IOUs. If she tried that on with the other girls, they’d just threaten to leave. So I have to go on and on about it before she’ll actually give me the money.
It’ll be just like your girlfriend. Lovely.
I want you to masturbate when you think about this moment. I’m going to play with my tits. I’m going to watch you come all over my tits, and then I’m going to rub it into them. Think of me when you wank yourself off, and I’ll be here waiting for you. Come for me. Yes.
How’s your day been?
He’s doing me doggie style, and he’s going, ‘Oh baby, come for me baby!’ And I’m thinking, ‘Really? Really? It’s only a half-hour booking!’
Stop, stop! Ha ha, you’re the pussy monster! Come here, pussy monster. Kiss me.
I brought my own sheets from home for the bed. It gives it more of a personal touch. Are you warm enough? It’s cold outside.
I’m thinking, ‘Man, it ain’t the 70s any more! No need for the porno bush!’ Ugh. What about you? Do you shave? Oh, okay. I can see that.
I forgot you like the two cover sheets on the bed. Everyone has their little quirks. Do you want me to get the CD player too? What have you brought for me tonight? Why is it always someone I’ve never heard of before? Do you actually like anyone who’s in the Top 40?
How’s your day been?
You have a really clean asshole.
I know! Hello? It’s a customer service job. You have to make an effort! But people still book her!
It’s not about me. It’s about making you feel nice. It’s your time.
But you’re not going to fuck me, are you? You’re not. I know.
No, that’s not part of my service. It’s too personal.
How’s your day been?
Why didn’t you pick any of them? What was wrong with them?
Hmn. Does it usually look like that?
Sure, I’d like that. See you soon.
Is that what’s bothering you? You don’t need to worry about me. I can take care of myself.
I could do this all night. It relaxes me.
How’s your day been?
This guy, the first thing he does in the room is he puts a knife down on the bedside table. And I’m like, ‘I don’t think so, I don’t think so’. No way. Next please.
We can discuss it when we get to the room. I’m sure we can come to some understanding.
I’ll tell you if anything makes me uncomfortable. Let me decide that.
Oh, it’s you again. What have you been up to, darling?
Look at yourself in the mirror. Look at yourself fucking me, going in and out.
How’s your day been?
Well, I guess we could take it off and you could come on my tits. You stand and I’ll sit on the edge of the bed.
How’s your aim?
Don’t get it in my hair or I’ll kill you.
I thought you understood. It costs extra. Everyone charges extra for it. No, don’t go. I’m sorry. How much do you have? Well, okay. I guess maybe we can just sort of do it a bit, and it’s okay this time. Sorry. I wasn’t being funny. I really thought you understood.
We can go through to the lounge and talk, off the clock. There won’t be anyone there at this hour of the morning.
How’s your day been?
I worry about you when I don’t see you for a while.
Of course, but let me just clean up first.
Well, … okay. But you have to put a condom on your finger.
Can I? I didn’t want to presume. You are a naughty boy.
You know your own body. You know the best way to touch yourself. Like that? That’s hot.
How’s your day been?
You’re doing fine, no complaints.
You’ve obviously had a lot of practice at that.
No, because you need to stay hard for that, and you can’t.
I should tell you, I’m not a kissing girl. Just so you know.
Most guys, they just think it’s something they’re supposed to say, they don’t actually want to do it.
How’s your day been?
I’ve already come twice today anyway. No, the first time I masturbated. I was bored. The place was dead.
Am I? Really? Is that what you really think?
I was the one who found him. I had to cut him down. But you understand that.
Hey, hey. What’s the matter, what’s the matter? It’s okay. It’s all okay.
Can I tell you something? Do you mind? I think you are the most passionate person I’ve ever met.
How’s your day been?
***
Photographs by Brassaï.
22 responses
I have only ever been a client in Australia: that is, in jurisdictions where the sex industry is either entirely decriminalized (New South Wales) or legalized and regulated (Victoria). That’s a very important consideration. It means that legal brothels in these states are public and accountable. I can investigate their business practices and only visit those held in good repute by clients and sex workers alike. I keep my eyes open; I ask questions; I seek independent confirmation of the answers. In fact, I know who runs most of the brothels I visited, and I made it my business to find out how they treat their workers.
Brilliant.
How’s your day been?
calenture – i am curious. did someone leave a comment that was later deleted and your comment was your reply, or did you add that on your own?
Wow, I love this. Very interesting. Reads like poetry. Thank you for sharing, and for providing the extra info in your comment.
@ Otterpop:
I was only replying to the voices in my head, but they raise some legitimate questions, which any serious person would want to address.
@ Calenture – I was wondering if you were talking about Australia from the comment that you were a ‘ranga’, ha.
I’m glad that you ask and seek to address those questions.
This is fantastic. Wow. Intense.
@ Calenture…. hilarious. Any serious person would.
Reminds me in a way of David Foster Wallace’s Brief Interviews With Hideous Men, which I deeply admire. I love innovative work. The kind that penetrates…
Have an awesome day.
What’s the problem? Have you been drinking or something?
Been there.
Thanks for making me laugh. I was bored. I didn’t masturbate, but I could have. Thanks for the suggestion.
This is fantastic. I love the mixture of emotions in this piece. Nervousness, entitlement, indifference, pragmatism. It also captures the strangeness of these interactions and how sometimes its just about getting the job done. Great window into this world Calenture.
I work in a brothel in Australia; some of these conversations sounded wonderfully familiar. There is a melodic tone to it all and I knew immediately that you were a local client. Much love.
I also know when clients are not going to pick me for the same reason as the sex worker quoted here. I felt a camaraderie when I read that.
Hey Kitty, thanks for stopping by. Not sure if you’re a regular visitor at The Rumpus, but if not, there is a lot of great content here from people with first-hand knowledge of the (American) sex industry. Which is why I submitted this piece here.
Thanks to everyone else for their comments too.
I loved this piece. I would love to read more of your work.
as a hooker I’ve said almost everything on this list a few times over… though some of them are outright lies.
a few of these things bothered me. you sound like a coercive client, taking advantage a bit. walking out on a girl cos she won’t give you an extra for free. fucked. manipulative.
nothing grosser than some dude writing about hookers for the book sales. set your novel some place else.
I’m not sure if I should reply to the last comment. But I think that Starlet raises three important issues, which I’d like to address. The first concerns lying. Most of these quotations have a performative element, but ‘performance’ is not the same as ‘fake’. If I enter any interaction with an priori assumption that the other person is lying to me, that makes it impossible to be generous, or to accept generosity. I don’t presume to know what was going through the mind of anyone quoted above, but I refuse to operate under a ‘hermeneutics of suspicion’. I try to enjoy the experience for what it is, without second-guessing every exchange or insisting that the speaker prove her bona fides. If that makes me a fool, well, I’d rather be a fool than a cynic. Having said that, there’s an obvious distinction in this list of quotations between speakers who are addressing me as a generic client (and thereby constructing themselves as generic sex workers), and speakers who are addressing me as an individual (and thereby revealing their own individuality).
The second issue is about extras and coercion. I’ve removed contextual information from all these quotations, but perhaps I should provide it for the line, ‘I thought you understood. …. I really thought you understood’, although the story does me little credit, since it reveals me as tight-fisted (not an attractive quality in a client).
Some sex workers in Australian brothels kiss; some don’t. Some charge extra for it; some don’t. Fair enough. Everyone has the right to set their own boundaries. And I never negotiate, on this or any other point. Yes is yes; no is no. Fine, move on. But if it does cost extra, I expect that to be specified clearly up front. In this case, the first I knew about it was when the bill was fifty dollars higher than I was expecting (in Australian brothels, you pay after agreeing in principle to the booking, but before anything sexual takes place). So I was a bit pissed off, and moreover, I didn’t have a spare additional fifty. Nor was I willing to go to an ATM. So I thought, maybe better just to cancel. Which is where the quotation comes in.
After hearing her explanation, I felt she was acting in good faith, it was obviously a genuine misunderstanding, so I paid what I had on me (about twenty-five on top of the three hundred base fee I think), and I went ahead with the booking. There wasn’t really any kissing though. Too awkward.
The third issue is about whether to write about my experiences at all. I’m aware that – as a client, and as a white straight male – I speak from a position of privilege. One way to acknowledge that is to listen, to accept that my perspective is not the only possible one. To read as much as I can by sex workers, to try to learn how to be a better client. But it’s not like there’s a glut of published accounts by clients. In fact, there is an absolute dearth of such accounts.
Why do I want to write about my experiences? Because I first went to a brothel during a very dark period in my life. And it wasn’t a degrading experience. Instead, I found compassion, kindness and empathy. I was given these things, for free. So I would like to say ‘Thankyou’ publicly.
This essay was written with affection and gratitude. I’m disappointed I failed to communicate that, so I wanted to end by restating that point.
Thank you for your comments, Calenture. I appreciated your piece, and I completely got where you were coming from. I thought it was honest and direct and brave. White male privilege aside, you told your truth. People can accept it or not.
No-one wants to be this guy: http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-think-that-stripper-really-liked-me,10883/. But ‘delusional loser’ or ‘sociopathic misogynist’ are not my only options. It’s a professional interaction, but it can still be friendly and respectful on both sides.
Calenture- I’d love to read more of your work but am having a difficult time finding it. Any suggestions? This particular article was really thoughtful and compassionate. Thank you for sharing these parts of your life, as well as the lives of the women you’ve encountered.
Thanks for your interest. I have published quite a lot under my real name (two books), but nothing previously on this subject matter, and I’ve only used this pseudonym here (and for some related comments on other sites).
I’m interested in the role of empathy in the sex industry. If I’m able to publish something more substantive on this theme, I’ll let you know.
The Rumpus has always been willing to debate these questions openly, and I thank them for it.
Is your novel available for sale online yet?
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