FUNNY WOMEN #84: An Open Letter to Thomas the Tank Engine
Let me be blunt: you’re a train with human attributes. Who are your parents? From what monstrous act were you conceived?
Funny Women
232 posts
Funny Women is a column for literary, feminist humor writing by non-men. Previous pieces have been anthologized out of wedlock in The Best American Nonrequired Reading, Oxford University Press’s Humor: A Reader for Writers, and Reader’s Digest. Edited by Elissa Bassist author of Hysterical. Submit your funny writing here.
FUNNY WOMEN #83: Rejection Letter
Certainly you are aware that Haughty is the largest magazine in the world, so we must assume that your submission was a mistake.
FUNNY WOMEN #81: xo, The Intern’s Mom
Gary’s excited to start his week-long internship at Lanson Corp tomorrow! We can’t thank you enough for this opportunity—and for the doors it will open after college.
FUNNY WOMEN #80: My Future Author Bios, from Least to Most Likely
This is Rupinder Gill’s 85th self-published book. She recently moved back in with her parents.
FUNNY WOMEN #78: Ambivalent Affirmations
Hey ladyfriend, are you going through a breakup? Is your job really hard right now? Is your life nothing more than all-consuming darkness and regret?
FUNNY WOMEN #77: Penal Codes
Following the trend of female lawmakers submitting bills to regulate men’s health, we decided to do the same. We are three straight, gay, single, married, white, Cuban, non-practicing Jewish women, which…
FUNNY WOMEN #76: A Person with Severe Social Anxiety Imagines What Will Happen If Seen Tripping on a Sidewalk
You! Rebecca Victoria O’Neal! I’ve just seen you trip on the sidewalk, confirming a long-held suspicion that you are a Bad Person with Whom I’d Never Hang Out.
Welcome to the Girls’ Club
“We’re secretaries fully versed in Derrida, receptionists who have read Proust in French. This is a land of girls. There are always at least ten of ‘us’ for every one of…
FUNNY WOMEN #75: Behind Every Great Man
To the left is a copy of Benjamin Franklin’s daily schedule, as found in a book. Below is what I imagine Mrs. Franklin’s daily schedule looked like.
FUNNY WOMEN #74: My Debilitating Anxiety Decodes My Unread Work Emails
When you send me an email, don’t think I don’t know what you’re really saying.