FUNNY WOMEN: A Makeup Look for Nuclear Anxiety
[W]hat's more thrilling than making the world more beautiful one haggard, agitated face at a time?
Funny Women
235 posts
Funny Women is a column for literary, feminist humor writing by non-men. Previous pieces have been anthologized out of wedlock in The Best American Nonrequired Reading, Oxford University Press’s Humor: A Reader for Writers, and Reader’s Digest. Edited by Elissa Bassist author of Hysterical. Submit your funny writing here.
FUNNY WOMEN: It’s Me, Dead Girl!
I just want to share a little bit about myself—because despite the fact that my horrific death is the point of the show you’re enjoying, you’ve never actually heard my voice.
FUNNY WOMEN: Other Contenders for 2017’s Word of the Year
Fückit: When you’ve had enough, more than enough, but somehow enough is never enough, and I put wine in my cereal now.
FUNNY WOMEN #157: Habits of Less Successful Writers
So much can be learned from the writing habits of successful writers, but what can we learn from the ones who aren’t doing quite as well?
FUNNY WOMEN #156: Fall Activities Adjusted for Global Warming
Due to rising sea levels, most orchards have been flooded. Instead of apple picking, grab a canoe large enough for the whole family and climb aboard.
FUNNY WOMEN #155: Feminine and Masculine Words
A helpful trick can be to picture feminine words (pumpkin latte, duvet cover) as butterflies. Soft, delicate, hard to catch, and useless except near flowers. Masculine words are more like knives.
FUNNY WOMEN #154: Visa Status of Disney Princesses
President Trump has suspended all H-1B visa processing, and He would like us to reevaluate several candidates who gained entry under the fashion-model exception.
FUNNY WOMEN #153: So You Want to Be a Woman
If the eyes are the window to the soul, then the drapes should match the wallpaper. Fix what you got and then flaunt what you fixed!
Funny Women #152: Features of the Groundbreaking American Writers Museum
We’ll be open as long as the National Endowment for the Arts is.
FUNNY WOMEN #150: A Little More About Customer #7611594
As for your offer to help me make sure I am getting the right gear, this is another question that troubles me hourly. Am I getting the right gear?
FUNNY WOMEN #149: Pilgrims Without Internet
The use of barn animals in unusual poses could be so amusing if transmitted broadly and with a sharp message! But that is not to be, and I must express my feelings, as usual, in cross-stitch.